My first Saudi day after 2 years.

It has been an excellent week since I came back from Makkah, Alhamdulilah.
I think a lot of the change had to do with my way of thinking. I sometimes spend a copious amount of time dreaming of far away places and ignoring the present time of my situation.  I wanted to change that, because I realized that I only have the present and that a distant dreamy place is just that.....a distant dreamy place.

So I decided to do some exploring around campus. By the encouragement of my fellow colleagues and their very attractive personalities, I decided to step outside my office a little bit and to get a shot of fresh air.
Today, a friend, asked me to join them for breakfast. I won't lie, the first thought to my mind was "but I just had a breakfast." However, since being polite is displaying a good character, I decided to suck it up, take up the kilos and enjoy a second round of breakfast.
The best part for me, was the fact that for the first time I could actually chill out with Saudi women and forget about the stereotypes and taboos that are so linked with that tag -line "Saudi women".  This might sound weird to an outsider reading this and wondering what the big deal is regarding hanging out with Saudi ladies....since I am a lady myself. Well, a lot of controversy surrounds this particular topic due to the lack of access into the Saudi culture. A lot of us assume it is better to stay away from Saudis, because socially it seems that people don't hang out that much. Also, in my previous job, we were warned time and time again, DO NOT be near the Saudis. Yes, believe that!!
It often made me very depressed, because as a visitor and a worker in Saudi, I often found it hard to explain or describe the Saudi social aspect to friends and colleagues in my country or countries that I visited. For me, being the person that I am, enjoying cultures, enjoying learning about them, it was even embarrassing not being able to say "well, a Saudi home looks like this from the inside.... and the guests are treated like this...." I couldn't speak of these things that were only mere objects that were unreachable for a period of time.
However, things have changed and for the first time, I can honestly give an opinion about Saudi ladies. Giving an opinion about students is a whole new topic on its own, and don't necessarily represent the entire Saudi female society.
While having breakfast with the Saudi teachers, I really enjoyed laughing with them and sharing a meal. It was of course more than the meal itself. I enjoyed the fact that they find happiness easily and don't drift too long on sad topics. Actually, the company was very refreshing. I was happy to know that it was also refreshing for them to have someone different in their circle of conversation and leisure time. The one lady even said "It is nice to see a different face." She was right, because the feeling was very mutual.
After that, me and my friend decided to visit most parts of the campus, walking in on lectures and just seeing what all the other students are up to. This was far more interesting than the usual thing that I would do, sitting in my office, on my chair and staring into open space.

Eventually, school was over and it was time to go home. We wanted to hang out somewhere and enjoy lunch together. The kind of town I live in, doesn't have many public facilities available for women.... like restaurants with a family section. There is a women's garden here, but was closed during the day. So, she took a brave step and asked me if I would like to enjoy lunch at her house.
I swear my ears were flip-flapping like elephant's ears of excitement, because I wasn't sure if I heard it all right.
Did she actually ask me to go with her to her house???
This might seem strange, but after hearing so many negative things and living in isolated conditions, I assumed that it is just not done in Saudi.
Of course realizing that I might NEVER have this chance again, I took full advantage of the invitation and said "YES" immediately.

This is a typical Saudi house. Big & Beautiful!

Soon we were on our way to her home. I was pretty excited. I think I was really curious of what it feels like to be in a Saudi home and how the setting is. I was nervous at most part of it, because I knew that her father was at home and I wasn't sure how he would take it that a foreign lady was visiting his house.
Soon as we entered the courtyard area, I realized that they have big homes. I mean, it is one thing driving past these huge houses and it is another thing standing in front of one so close, so near.
When we got in the house, I saw her father and I won't lie I was ready to pass out. Not for the fact that I had a glimpse of a man, but it was all in the name of respect.
She explained to him that I am one of the colleague at school and will be hanging out together for the afternoon. I quickly passed by her father and uttered a "Selam Alaykum". I think he was pretty aware of me being scared. My friend did describe my eyes looking distressed, like I just saw a ghost.

This is  how the outside rooms for festivals look like.

Anyhow, soon we were in the women's area.  We took off our abayas, switched on the AC and it was time to rock and roll.
Saudis are very true to the culture and enjoy sticking to their culture. The captivating part of their culture is that it is in their homes. You can't rely on the outside life. It is simply not enough. You need to actually be in a proper Saudi setting to fully understand. Due to the fact that Saudis LOVE privacy, it is hard to access their culture. Even within the family, the young ones are encouraged to hang out with the young ones and not  to mingle as much with the older ladies. Sounds much like how things work back home in Africa.
However,  caught by suprise, Saudi girls are allowed to visit their friends at their homes. I know this might sound really silly. However, if you have lived in Saudi and you see the climax of the social life, which is on a constant 3 out of 5, you would naturally assume that girls only get to see their friends at school and not at home. However, in the more open minded areas of Saudi, girls get to catch up with their friends at their homes. They often come home at ungodly hours of the night and even switch drivers. Excuse me!! I think this called SOCIAL LIFE!! GO GIRLS!!

So, a particular Saudi house has different entrances for men and women. There are also appropriate times for visiting. So, you can' t just pop by, the unexpected hoping to be expected.
There are also different lounge rooms for men and women. The women chill on their own, the men chill on their own, and of course the kids can run in between.
Most houses have 3 floors, actually. First floor that is where all the lounges are, kitchen and reception area. The second floor is where all the bedrooms are. The third floor is the area for the guests. Actually, my friend told me that they have 2 extra rooms for guests.
When we went for a tour outside the house, we got to go to the roof top of the house, where we could see the town market. This was pretty dodgy as we were not geared in our abayas, and we were running from one point to the other lowering our bodies so that no one could see us. The roof terrace was really nice, a place anyone can go for some fresh air or just to gaze at the midnight stars.
We made our way down to the courtyard and went around the backside of the house. There were 2 rooms, one for men and one for women. These rooms are specifically used for festivals, for prayers and celebrating and observing the Islamic events. My friend explained to me, for Eid or any celebration, the whole room is layed out with platters and platters of food.
Food is very much appreciated in the Saudi culture. You are probably thinking what foods do they indulge in? Well, the famous Kabsa, Jereesh, Muttabaq, and many other Arabic foods.
In order to have such a large sum of food one needs to have a large kitchen to prepare this. When she showed me the size of the kitchen I was pretty much in heaven. If  you know me well, you would know that I have a big love for cooking and being in the kitchen. So, when I saw the size of the kitchen I was pretty happy. The kitchen is so large and in charge that it makes the idiom "no two chefs in one kitchen" very in-valid.

This picture is an injustice to how really big the size of the kitchen was.

After our parade in the courtyard, we went back to the women's lounge and she asked me to teach her some African dancing. It was so nice to hear someone asking something about my culture. It is always me asking questions and wanting to learn something about others, but no-one ever asks me. So, it was really heart warming when she asked me that. So, soon we put on some beats and did some dancing moves. It was pretty awesome. It made me happy to see two people from two different cultures having so much to share about ideas, thoughts and even dancing.
I took it upon myself to teach her some South Africa's finest "Petsi" dancing, some "Kwaito" dancing (to the best of my ability), and some "Sokkie" (after all I do come from a very Dutch town).
You wouldn't believe that being in Saudi for almost one 2 years I have never had someone to actually dance with me. Yes, my life was that tragic. Instead of having to enjoy what I always used to enjoy, I used to just ignore it all, because the environment was never conducive enough to encourage such "spontaneous" behavior.  Halt!!! A Saudi girl was willing enough to learn something and wanting to participate. It was a lot of fun.

Really, I know I dragged this blog out to the point where my keyboard even refuses to type out more. However, no one can possible comprehend the amazing phenomena that I had to experience today. It was really a day out of the ordinary. I told my friend
"You do know that people won't believe me that I was in a Saudi house. They will say 'na zim you are lying to us' ."  She replied to me "You 're kidding me, no one would believe there was a South African in my house. They would think I am lying."

So my day was a true Saudi day. My first real Saudi day after being in this country for almost 2 years....

Patience brings many blessings with it.