Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Schools out!! The bell has rang for a vacation!

So the school year has come to an end and everyone is packing their bags and ready to go visit families or to just go for a chilled out weekend to a desired destination.
 I have to say , it was one big sigh of finishing off and finally letting my last batch of students for this year go.
As I have mentioned before in one of my blogs that teaching is not always just about giving information and having students to learn from you. The most amazing value one learns is that even a teacher never stops learning.. ever!
I remember the first time I walked into my first class and how overwhelmed I was with nerves and not knowing whether I will be a good teacher or not, not knowing whether this group will be okay or not. However, stepping into a classroom filled with eager students was like stepping into a relationship.
The most amazing things that these girls have taught was to take life easy. Coming from a very fastlane background, working for 4 different jobs and still trying to see family and to still enjoy life was daunting. For the first time, I got to appreciate life for what it is. I got to go home and do nothing. That was the biggest shock.... to relax. To be a woman, not needing to prove anything to anyone, no need to be impressive, but just to be a teacher and a woman. I can honestly say my students have shaped my expectations into a sculpture of life that I never knew could be accomplished.
When we were done with marking, loading up the marks and finally signing off, I went to my class and sat down. It was empty with chairs still in their examination positions. I could see their faces and feel the daily class atmosphere even though they weren't there. I do this ritual of sitting in an empty class after finishing off the year to reflect the good and bad and the ugly. To my amazement, there was more good than bad that I have learned this year. One of the good things was "students appreciate you" ,even though they sometimes don't show it, or when they hiss at you or even when they pretend that they don't see, believe me they appreciate you.
Secondly "students will not always be students". They grow in front of your eyes, they learn and they anticipate their lives with you. The best part is to hear their dreams of becoming great women of our era and to be good nurturers for their children. Also, a great dream doesn't need to be an architect, or a doctor or even an engineer. No those kinds of things don't define great dreams. Great dreams are things we truly believe we can do and set in this world to do, even if it means to be a mother, or a good wife one or even just a good person in this life. So, I learned a lot my from my girls. I wish them well and I really hope they will not forget their young days of just being girls! Bonn voyage young ladies!
So, school was out, done and dusted. It was time for me to pack and to say goodbye to all the good teachers that have also played an important role during this summer school.
As I was packing, I started freaking out as to how I would be in South Africa this time. I realized that I have changed so much, and my environment has had a great impact on me. I like the person that I have changed to, I have learned to live by rules and laws of my religion and for the first time I am going back to S.A, where those rules and laws will only depend on me. I was freaking out of how will I manage doing everything on my own and travelling on my own, because I have not done that for so long. Even when I was going to Turkey, I was never on my own. I was driven around by a friend and being taken care of by my Turkish family.
I almost decided not to go to South Africa. However, I have to go. I must see my family and friends. Most of all I must see myself back  where I was born.

It will be an experience being in South Africa, where the earth is green and lush with flowers and trees. Where the earth doesn't scorch as much as it does in the dessert. Where freedom was fought for by the youth. However this time I have decided to be a tourist in my country. The cultural shock of being back and not fitting in anymore will be a reality. A good one at that.
However, Saudi has become my home. It is my home in so many ways. It is my home in a spiritual level, mental level and even the physical level. My religion lives here, it is not a struggle as it used to be back home. The way life is here has become part of my life. I enjoy walking around in my abaya and niqab and I enjoy the moral level of this country. Most of all I am safe and sound here. Life moves on here, even if it is silent sometimes. I have done a lot of growing up here.
So, I will enjoy S.A for what it is and to be around people I love and appreciate with all of my heart. However, I will come back to my Saudi to live my life and to really enjoy the person that I am!.

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Tribute to the Women of South Africa

Unfortunately I missed the day of Women's Day in South Africa. I only discovered that it was Women's Day through Facebook statuses. I was actually impressed how many women congratulating each other on this Wonderful day.

So, my tribute to Women's Day is to all the Mothers, Sisters and Wives of our nation that face adversities day by day and still have the inner power to go on and keep their families together. Against all odds you still shine and nurture.
So, instead of me blabbing in this blog post. I want to dedicate a poem I wrote bout 5 years ago.

Sweet Woman Sweet mother
Her skin is the first you touch when you enter this world.
She women's up from the days that she is only a girl.
Her pearls are hidden in her eyes and behind her heart
Spoken words of love is our shield, her face is our guard.
In her essence of being and to be ominous in our lives
Her glow of happiness could light up your night.
Even though her years may tire her, may wear her off
Somehow she still goes on and carries on to give love.
Her perfume that often stays behind long after she said goodbye
Hating to leave her babies behind drowning in their cries.
She had the strength to pick up your tiny body until now
Even older now, she still picks us up when we are down
Her touch is untainted, unique sweet thunder caress
The sense...... intense..........endless.
Sweet woman, sweet mother. 
you are endless, from daughter to mother.
you are endless. from girl to woman
you are endless, your caress, intenssseeee, an incensssee in me. 

Riyadh- city of lights and marriage!

So, I escaped for a weekend to the big city and do what big girls do........enjoy a good weekend away.
I was lucky to have gotten some time out of Jouf. Every fibre of who I am was aching to "get out" for a minute and to get some fresh air to breath.
I spend 2 and a half exciting days in Riyadh with a relative of mine.  I haven't seen this relative since the time I left South Africa, and we promised each other that it isn't a "goodbye", but a "see you soon brother/sister". We didn't realise that soon would elongate to 8 months later. However, without counting the days and months, it was still awesome to see him and to get that bit of South Africa he brought with him.

When I arrived at the airport, I thought it will be tricky, as to how will he notice me, since I looked like all the other ladies..heavily veiled. I quickly sent him a message saying "I am the one in the black and blue abaya", and he just replied "I am the one in the white thoab".  Jokes aside, I was freaking out on how he would recognise me. Then suddenly I had flashback of how the girls do it when their brothers pick them up from school. THEY go to the car. So, I had to really strain my eyes to find him in the mush of white thoabs. Finally, I saw him, but I recognized him from the walk, rather the face. I know that walk. I lured behind him and said "Selaam brother". He turned around and was shocked to see the girl that used to wear a mini-skirt back in South Africa was fully veiled, no skin showing. I am sure for a second he wasn't sure to say "Sis is that you under there".
Oh it was awesome to have a little bit of home in Saudi through a close friend. It was as if , we relived who we were back in Stellenbosch.
We quickly got into the car and all of a sudden the Riyadh wave slit my face side ways. Riyadh is much hotter that Skakah. We drove around trying to find a good place for me to stay in for the weekend. Now, I am pretty much spontanous, never-book-beforehand-kinde-girl, but that was a bad idea. So, ladies, if you are planning to go to Riyadh, make sure that you some research of hotels/b&b/inn carefully, because some of them do not take in single women. However, we were very lucky to have found a nice spot for me somewhere in Riyadh.
Soon the weekend began. All I knew that for this weekend I did not want anything that I have had in Skakah. First on the "do not try list" was CURRY!!!. I think I am officially done with this dish. I have had it in all shapes and tastes and my palate is screaming abuse....so does my stomach lining.  Secondly no pizza, no take out nothing of that sort. It was a weekend to explore and to really taste the Saudi culture.
Little I know, my dear relative had planned some things already. First of all we went to a nice Lebanese restuarant. The food was really delicious, the vegetables were clean and the setting was nice. It was the first time to sit and actually talk. For the first time he could see my face since 8 months ago.  It was a real shocker to myself too. Shocker that I have indeed changed a lot. Everytime the water would come to bring the food, my instinct would shoot up and I would grap my scarf and drape it over my face. When he saw that, he made sure that he got the food at the little doors. Now, if you are reading this and maybe this is confusing. In Saudi most restuarants have two entrances; one called a "single section",which is often for single guys only. two: family section, which is for families and women with their husbands or relatives. In the family section area the table are often placed in an enclosed are where there are doors to give the family more privacy, so the dining table and chairs have all a wall build around them with doors. In the beginning I thought it was a pretty cold gesture. I am from  South Africa,where everything is open and people often invades ones space. I first found this whole privacy thing as very unfriendly and non welcoming.
However this time, I enjoyed every bit of it. I love the privacy. The privacy to let my hair down a little, to eat in peace and quiet without someone seeing me put the food in my mouth. The privacy of your family sharing a good dinner together.
Next to us, was another family sitting in their own little room. I couldn't hear the mom and dad having a conversation. However, the kids were playing. That is what restaurants are for these children, a play ground with forks and knives.
We ate our delicious meal and decided to go for a nice drive before heading to a coffee shop. We drove all around Riyadh. In my head people say Paris is the city of blinding lights. Well I saw, Riyadh is the city of bursting lights. Everywhere was glittering and the building that were made of glass were shining beautifully in the velvet of the night.  It was way over midnight, and yet the high ways of Riyadh were full. The traffic isn't any better than in Skakah, but the most amazing thing in this country is that; No matter how bad you drive, no one gets angry. South African can take a note or two from this, since we suffer from extreme road-rage.
We ended up at a nice coffee shop and sat down for a while. It was really nice, peaceful and comfortable. The best thing me and my relative do is talk about everything. We can talk about a topic until the topic has holes in it. I told him about my skin paranoia, and he agreed that I was officially losing my mind and that I had no skin problems.
We then went to drive for 2 hours on the road. It was nice. Riyadh is massive, and the roads are endless. Endless to drive on them for hours and to let the city be your muse. I got back to my room at about 3:20.
The next day we did proper Saudi things. First of all ,we went to a nice Saudi restuarant.
It had the most beautiful decorations with its colourful wooden window locks. It had the most awesome carpets and drapes of tapestry all over. We picked a nice dining room for us to sit in. As we entered our room, we took our shoes off at the entrance. Like traditional saudis, we sat on the floor on comfortable cushions with beautiful decorated scattered cushions about. The room was dark and cool. There were traditional ornament of the Saudi culture from back in the days. Then for the first time since I came to this landof milk and honey, I tasted REAL Kabsah! Not the strange grilled chicken that is burned. No, this was proper meat Kabsah with a deliciously flavoured rice. On the side we had Jareesh. Now, Jareesh can be confusing to those who have never tried it. Jareesh is similar to bulgur. The only difference is that bulgur is cracked wheat, whereas Jareesh is the whole wheat-berry. It is prepared in a special way,which makes it have a very creamy consistency which tastes lovely with lamb.  Actually I did some research on it, and Turks use it in some of their soups. However, this grain Jareesh tastes absolutely delicious. I almost forgot about the KABSA as I was diving into the Jareesh. The true Saudi experience is when I had to eat with the hand.
Now, I am straight from Africa, so eating with the hand is not a new thing for me. However, we don't ear rice with the hand, only larger objects...like meat...and corn.
He explained it to me step-by-step how one eats with the hand. First, you grab a relative amount of rice  and let it sit in the middle of your hand. Gather it into a 'ball" shape in your hand so that it is neatly stacked. Then, take your entire hand near your mouth, slip your tongue underneath the rice and scoop it up into your mouth with your tongue. He didn't exactly explain it to me like this, I watched him do this. It worked! It is tricky at first since the rice will fall over your clothes. Practice makes perfect. After 20 minutes I got the hang of it.
I didn't care about it, I enjoyed it so much. For the first time someone was teaching me something about Saudi. I knew there was more to this country than oil and shopping malls.
After that, we headed to the coffee and tea area. We sat near the guy who was preparing traditional Arabic coffee and serving mint tea. It was nice sitting near him and watching him preparing the cups, the coffee and the dates. It was a real treat.

After that adventure we went to the KINGDOM TOWER. Now this tower is really beautiful and extremely big. The Saudi's have a special name for it, which I shall not mention :). However, the tower is gorgeous inside and outside. We got to the top floor and saw Riyadh from above. Riyadh was a city under a cloud of soft dust, with many open areas in between. Riyadh looked peaceful from up there. I made a point of taking some pics of this really nice city.
Then it was time for some shopping. Now, I am a nervous shopper. I often want people to make decision for me when they shop with me. So, we decided to look for a nice Hookah pipe to take home with me. The only help I got from choosing a nice pipe was "don't choose the nice shapes, those pipes are worse". So, I decided to choose the most shapeless one and the reply was "excellent choice". Bingo!
After that we ended up at the old side of Riyadh. To be frank, I liked that part more than the new Riyadh. Old Riyadh had character, old souk shops, the buzzing of the people selling and buying and very unorganized. It was nice. We crossed the street to find ourselves in an area where they sell sheep heads...and as I was turning to go ahead and a man was carrying an entire slaughtered sheep in a wheel barrow!! I was gasping under my niqab for serious air of shock! It was Africa playing in front of my eyes.
I quickly forgot about that scene and we ended in a music shop. That is when I met the "Oud", which is a pear-shaped stringed instrument.  This man had beautiful instruments and for the first time I also got to meet the "duff" ,which is a percussion instrument and considered halal. It was nice to sit and listen how the shop keeper was playing the Oud, and soon relative on my side decided to play. So it was a real treat for me.
As I am lover of music, being surrounded by musical shops is only heaven to me. I ended up buying a very long neye. Today for the first time I tried playing it and it works.
After that nice shopping spree we decided to go buy some shoes and gold. We looked around for nice gold. I am very picky when it comes to things like jewelry. I often go for the motto "less is more" when it comes to decorating myself. I opted for a beautiful gold ring with a black stud and "diamonds" encrusted on the side. The gold is real and the ring is heavy!
Soon we decided to go look for some rugs. We ended up in this beautiful store, where all the traditional Saudi rugs were sold. From camel bags, to wall decorations, it was all beautiful and authentic. I opted for this beautiful off red rug to drape over my couch at home. During our shopping we bumped into other South Africans who were suspicious. They didn't believe me that I was South African. I wasn't sure if it was the niqab or the accent.
When we finished doing all the shopping. My brother decided to pop in at a local utility shop. I was curious as to what he wanted to buy there. He came out with a tea-flask. I didn't think much of it. Then we drove off to some stall where he gave the tea-flask to him. We waited for a while there. I didnt want to ask why there is a tea-flask and a dude making tea. After the man gave the flask back with hot tea cute little cups. I thought we were going to sip some tea in the car. However, there were better plans. We went to this lovely park in Riyadh which was buzzing with families and children playing about. We parked and as we got out, my brother went to the trunk and  took out and enire picnic set-as in blanket and all! I was really impressed! It was about twilight, so the temperature was perfect to sit outside on the grass and to drink hot tea.
We found a nice spot in between the families and sat there. It was a real treat. It was actually the best for me. I looked about while sitting on the grass and sipping my tea that life in Saudi is really nice, WHEN YOU ARE MARRIED!. Life is miserable if you are single, which is good, because it encourages people to get married. Shopping, camping, eat, playing and sitting at the park are all things for married people. If you are not married with who are you going to do all of those things??? No pressure boys, no pressure!.
We sat there for some time and had another great discussion..."women's rights". which is another blog topic on its own.
After sipping tea for almost 3 hours. We decided to head down to an Italian restaurant. Once again, the family section rocked. The privacy setting was awesome. There was even a button that I could press if I wanted to be disturbed or not! All I remember of that Italian restuarant was how my mouth was heaven wrapped in spinach and ricotta ravioli in a beautiful cheese and tomato cream sauce. I was a happy woman!
After that, all I wanted to go for a nice long drive around Riyadh. We drove around , talked about things were    of hindress of the soul, things that almost made a mirror image of us. At the same time music that reminded me of home were pulling me between two different time zones. My life of who I was then and the woman that I am now. I was pretty shocked at how much I have changed. I concluded from this weekend that change is not, change is good if you sticking up for it.
We did a nice tour to the desert. We drove like in to the desert, as South Africans would say "in die bundus". We drove so deep that even the car automatically beeped to say "I am not going any further". We parked. We got out, and sat for a few seconds. I breathed the peace and freshness of the desert. The heat was teasing my nostrils and my eyes were useless in the straight darkness. It felt as if it was just me, earth and air. Not long, we had to leave again. It was nice. Short and Sweet.  As we drove,we passed a cluster of cars in patched across the desert of Saudi men hanging out, sitting on their blankets and drinking their tea or coffee. It was so nice to see that. It was nice to see that people have innocent pleasurable time with their friends. It made me happy to see them taking time out in the middle of the desert and to breathe fresh air with their friends.
On the last day, we managed to get some baby stuff, bought lovely Islamic books, which I will treasure and give to anyone who want to learn as much I want to about our beautiful religion.
When I ended up at the airport. I had a box of Al Qassim dates, a bag full of a weekend and luggage of true friendship. It was time for me to go home. I hate saying goodbye. It is as if all of it is lost or rather captured in memories. That is all it turned out to be, a weekend of beautiful memories. I am really lucky to have learned some Saudi things. Most people will be wondering "what is the big deal, you can learn it while you are living there". It isn't as simple as that when our lives are restricted to the Western compounds. So, it is a blessing to learn something new in this country.
Like I said, Riyadh is the city of massive lights and believe it is more glowing when you are married!. It doesn't make sense living there and being single. it is like 1+1=0.