Father's Day-Bitter Sweet

I am trying to remember when was the last Father's Day I celebrated, and sometimes I don't want to know nor want want to count how many I have celebrated.
So many times we often focus on the role of a mother and how special our mothers are to us, after all they carried us for 9 months of their lives and never gave up carrying us.
In my age, I have learned to appreciate my mother as much as I can, since she is the only parent I have.
Unfortunately my father passed away when I was 15 and that was a tender age for me.
People always say, a girl will always look for her father in every guy she meets, since her father is the first man that sets the bar up high. It is true! Every guy that I have scanned that didn't meet my expectations (set up by my father) was never going to make it till the end of the week when I decided not to answer my phones.
One thing that hits really to the heart are memories. Memories of how much I loved my father regardless of his short commings and what a role he played in shaping the woman that I am today.
I often try to forget Father's Day, because it often jerks a tear or two, however I learned to remember the good things and to appreciate the existance of our fathers.
Saudi has never hit home, like it has hit home regarding fathers. When I look at my students. they always share stories about their fathers taking them anywhere they like, protecting them and being the head of the house.
I look at the situation back home and I realised that most families break down, because the role of the father and the mother has changed. Now a days women earn more than the men, the women takes care of the kids and still does her 8 hour job and still attend her roles. Sometimes, the men feel that they have lost that role of "importance" being shoved at the background of the family.
Now, I know some ladies might be thinking; On who's side are you? Well ,I am on nobody's side, I am just writing from my observations. I think that there is a great "power struggle" on roles regarding families. Now a days you even get "stay at home dads", which I think is a big NO NO!!
As much as women had to rise up and take on a fewer roles, because of some dudes that couldn't do a great job of it, it still doesn't mean the role of the dad is lost.
We as ladies and girls need to appreciate our husbands and fathers and boost them by showing them that they ARE the head of house, that we DO need their protection and need them to interfere when they feel the family is in danger. In today's society girls are craving that. Craving for a father's affection and someone to give guidance regarding life choices. The same with boys, boys need their fathers to learn how to keep a family together and to be a good leader of the house and at work.
So my short blog dedicates to all the fathers and I recognise the role they play. As women, daughters and mothers, we appreciate your guidance, love and attendance. Most of all we appreciate the tenderness of your love and always trying to fix everything for us. So girls love your fathers and fathers love your daughters! Believe me boys, you don't want to meet a girl with "daddy issues".
Ciao

Dammam- a perfect get away!

As I have said I would spend a week in Dammam, and so I did. At first I couldn't quite picture this little paradise on the gulf of Saudi Arabia. However, I was praying that it would not resemble anything like where I have been staying for the past 7 months, otherwise I would ask the Saudi Airlines and the Tulip Inn hotel for a refund.
I was very pleased with Dammam  the moment I arrived there. The taxi driver who ended up being my personal shouffer for my entire stay in Dammam was a real doll.

Most of my friends would know that I am terrible at planning any trip anywhere. The only thing that I am good at planning is the flight arrangement, making sure I have enough cash in my bank card and to make sure that my back up plan credit card is near me. Anyhow, I hate planning for trips, I think it takes all the fun out of discovering a new place. Adding to that, I hate booking into fancy schmancy hotels that hold nothing about the place.

When the taxi driver picked up me up at the airport, I gave him a list of possible places that I would like to stay at for the week I would be spending in Dammam. He looked at me as if I am crazy. He asked me "no booking? no telephone number?" I said "No". Clearly he got the message that this girl is either dumb or is easy-going.
We found the Boudle hotel, which was across the gulf sea. Unfortunately it was full. Then we proceeded to the next hotel called the Tulip Inn. Luckly they had a room available and they gave me a discount since I am a teacher and from South Africa. Me and the Bangladeshi bell-boy had a fierce argument about cricket, which is a beloved sport in our countries. He told me that Mkayanti is a great bowler but a poor batsman. I looked at him and said, "maybe you can make that comment when you beat us at the next tournament. We laughed. He escorted me to the room and it was a beautiful suite. It had a flat screen TV, a "HUGE' kitchenette and a beautiful designer bathroom and room. I was happy to have arrived in Dammam. The first thing that I wanted to do was to sleep, since I was travelling late night early morning. He left me in peace and quiet. After Magrib (6:30). I decided to explore and to look for Starbucks coffee shop. Yes, I love Starbucks and so does my fellow South African teacher. Me and the driver drove all around Dammam not being able to find it. I started getting mad at him for not knowing this location.....IT IS HIS JOB TO KNOW!!!. Anyhow, after failing at our search, I asked him to just drive me around so that I can get something to eat and to just see Dammam.

Dammam is beautiful, much more beautiful than Riyadh by far. I mean, Dammam's building are beautiful, logical, strategical, the city itself looks like a plan. There are many traffic circles or as the Brits would call it "Round Abouts". The shopping malls are huge, there are a variety of coffee shops, Western restuarants and things to do.
On the second day in Dammam, I was lucky to meet up with another fellow teacher, we sat at Starbucks and drank delicious late and had tight conversations. It was nice to do something like that. I have to be honest, the one thing that I miss by far since I have been in Saudi are my coffee shop moments. Just sitting outside with friends or alone, having my laptop on, drinking my Earl Grey or Chai Latte and enjoying  the fresh air. In Dammam I could do that with no fuss. At night I managed to make my way to the beach for a nice long walk. It was beautiful, peaceful and just nice. By far that was the best thing I did in Dammam, the very thing I went to Dammam for.
On the 3rd and 4th day I enjoyed good shopping therapy! I bought a designer abaya, bought beautiful clothes from Promod (yes, in South Africa I wouldn't be able to afford even entering Promod). I ate delicious KFC and MacDonalds. It was beautiful.
By the time I left Dammam, I left half broke. So, be sure to know that in these nice places you need some serious cash.
However, my trip was really good. The flights were great and I met an Italian man on my way to Riyadh. I told him that I am planning to go to Italy and enjoy the food and the culture. He gave me a beautiful story about Italy and ofcourse like an Italian he was passionate with his words. We got on to my favourite topic, food. He gave me a few simple recipes on how to make delicious pasta with garlic and oil, tomato, onion and oil and to make my own tomato sauce. He said once you go the natural route of foods you will never do tinned and bottle sauces every again. Amen brother!
When we arrived in Riyadh, both our flight were late at night, so we decided to share a lunch, chat and getting into the history of things. He has 4 sons and a wonderful wife. He invited me to go join his family for a lovely vacation in Italy. He told me that life is beautiful and that we should always have a target in life. I was captivated by his charisma, his age of experience and appreciation of life.
When it was time for him to go, he gladly gave me his contact details and told me to please keep in touch and to let him know about my plans whenever I decide to go to Italy.
I got onto my flight to Jawf and by far I was thinking about all the good people I met on my trip, the lovely things I saw and did and I am grateful to be able to do all of this at this young age.
Yes, life is too short to get pissed off, just enjoy it and live it. As my first boss told me "there is not such thing as bad or good experiences, life is just an experience!".
Now, I can't promise you that you will have an awsome time as I did in Dammam, but what I can promise you is that Saudi is big and beautiful. It is a good thing to go to the different places instead of trying to find the first flight out of here. There are many things to do, lots of beautiful things to see and to enjoy the food.

Happy Holidays.

ps: If you do go to Dammam, I have placed a list of good hotels that are in the Corniche area aka near the sea. They are not too pricy and you can always strike a deal with them.

1. Boudl Hotel, Al Shatea Corniche, Dammam. Make sure to do some more planning than me with this Hotel. It seems to be popular and fully booked during the summer season.
2. Tulip Inn, Al Shatea Corniche, Dammam. I stayed in this one. There is another one that is not in the Corniche area, but in the middle of town. They have 5 star rooms and if you are just a backpacker there are rooms ara available at a good price.
3. Juman Suites Hotel Dammam, Mubarkiah Area, Abu Huraitah Street. It is also a 3 star hotel...I have no idea how great or bad this one is.:)

Health bits and pieces. Remedies to keep the dry rashes of Saudi out.

I have had an interesting experience during my holiday in Dammam. It didn't start with a big bang at all,but rather with some chinese medicine and health tips.
On my way to Dammam, I met an interesting Chinese man, his name is Frank. Well, most people will say to me, "zim you like meetin random people". However this man was not random at all, actually he was extra ordinary.
We were both sitting at the Al Jouf airport waiting for our flight from Jouf to Jeddah. Somehow we started talking, he told me he was from China and  that he came to Saudi for telecommunication business.
It was nice to see a different face and to hear a different story about travels and cultures.
The moment I said that I was from South Africa, his eyes widened and we started sharing the love of our countries.
He told me about how difficult life is in China, when there are other billion people trying to prove a point, it forces anyone to work harder to get the job.
On the plane, we talked about health. He gave me all the health tips I needed to stay healthy and to keep fit. He said "drink lots of milk, eat lots of yoghurt and avoid sugar". He said that honey is the best cure for anything. After that he told me that eating garlic is healthy but can also be useless and just give you bad breath. He said that most people like to just peel the garlic and eat it like that, whole. From his experience and chinese healing knowledge, he said that that is the worse way to eat garlic. You should peel the garlic, cut it up into small pieces, leave it for 20 minutes until the garlic changes colour and then eat it. That is the best way to benefit from its healing powers. I was really indulging in his knowledge of medicine and how we can use ordinary home foods to give us the health and protect us from disease.
After that he gave me a small bottle with green liquid inside of it, he said whenever you are feeling stressed or even sick, you should tap a bit of the green liquid in the side of your temples, at the bottom of your nose and on your forehead, it will make you feel better. I took the green medicine and placed it in my bag. I really enjoyed hearing all about it.
He also said after you eat, you need to drink hot green tea, it helps to break the fatty foods down, helps to clean your stomach and good for digestion.
I swear that he read me like an open book, as if he knew that I was trying to find health remedies to make my life easier in the desert.
I have been suffering from numerous problems since I arrived in Jouf. Most of all dry skin! I am telling you, it is the combination of dry air and bathing in hot sea water that will give you a skin that looks like a prune.
I have had rashes appear on my back, my left leg and on my left hand. I thought that I might have a skin disorder. However the chemist and most doctors have told me, it is just dry skin. They all gave me an ointment to help me keep the rashes out.
However, none of them worked really well. Now that I have come to Dammam, the rash that annoyed me on my hand has almost dissapeared. That is the cure! The cure is moist air, moist and humid air. Dammam is just that, moist and humid due to the sea. My skin has never felt as soft and moisurized just by going outside and sweating.
I have also gone back to traditional African remedies, like "coco butter".. as you know Africans swear by it. It is the number one lotion that will lock the moisture in and leaving your skin soft and supple.  Another "traditional" lotion or skin ointment I have gone back to is vasaline. That blue label tub is the best to keep the skin as soft as a baby's bottom without any side effects.
I have thrown away half of the lotions I have bought to fight this dry epidemic and have gone back to what I know best.
This is just a simple insight about the little things that people don't tell you when you come to Saudi. Dryness! Especially in Riyadh and in the north of Saudi. Your feet will look like you have been a hippy for the past 5 years and have been walking barefeet. So ladies make sure to bring some serious lotions that will beat the dryness.
Dammam's climate and geographical location is perfect to get moisture and to keep things supple. It is humid, like your clothes sometimes stick to your body, but it keeps the body moist and sweating which is the best way to keep dry rashes,sand rashes and anything that will make you look beaten up, chewed up and then spat out.

I was lucky to have made my way to a spa in Skakah,which is opened by the princess herself. This spa provides all kinds of treatments, you name it, from pedicures to captules that will make you lose weight.
I opted for a pedicure and what a choice I made. That philipino lady scrubbed my feet till she couldn't anymore. She removed all the dead skin due to dryness and wearing sandles away. She told me the best way to keep my feet moist and protected was to put some glycerine on my feet with socks every night. I must say she did a darn good job of making my feet look eatable:)

So, for those that are coming to the north of Saudi, Riyadh or anywhere in the middle of Saudi, make sure you pack your skin lotions in and prepare yourself for a climate that can sometimes be harsh.
The Saudi ladies go to the spa to get their treatment, but I think that you can also treat yourself at the comfort of your home.

So take the tips and see what is best for you.

The summer diet plan- gotta look good habibi

It is that time of the year again, to look fit and to get a man. Now, first of all, part one I can do, looking fit isn't a  problem. The problem is part two, getting a man.
My environment is just not suitable for that.
I am just kidding.
It is summer in Saudi Arabia and everyone is going to the coastal areas to get the best holidays. Well, I will soon enjoy mine on Monday.
At the mean time, I am on this summer diet... called The Low Calorie Diet. So far I have managed to lose 10 kgs in a week, which is awesome, since genetically that kind of blessing doesn't occur often. I have accompanied my diet with regular exercises that I do every morning. So far so good.
I have stayed away from sugar quite well and have implemented nutritious meals that will keep me fuller for longer.
Why am I on a  diet? Well, as soon as you get to Saudi you will realize why. The traditional food is packed with serious carbs and loads of saturated fats. For example, kabsa, which is a traditional meal here is not a good way to fill up. Secondly, there is no place for anyone to really get a proper work out.  So you are pretty doomed.
However I decided to take matters into my own hands and to do something about it.
All I am saying I don't want to look like Cindy Crawford or Tyra Banks, I just want to look 10 kg lighter than what I am right now.
All my friends that know me are telling me that I am crazy for wanting to lose that weight. However, I need a change and need to feel better about myself when I look into that mirror.
It is really refreshing to wake up at 5:00 am in the morning and to get a nice work out before the Saudi sun roasts you. After that I do my salat and then go to work or just sit at home (I know, that is so me to sit around in the house).
However, to live healthily and to really keep the weight down is possible in Sakakah. You just got to really plan it well and use the space you have in the compound to exercise.
I attempted to learn how to swim, but half way in my attempt, I got a spark. Swimming isnt for African girls. I mean, while I was learning how to swim, I didn't care about anything but my hair. It isn't the end of the world not knowing how to swim, that is why floating devices have been created....for sisters that just want to enjoy a splash here and there.
So, keep your fingers crossed as I am attempting to achieve my goal weight and to be in top shape.
Don't worry, I am not starving myself, I don't live on air and water.
I have managed to work out a well balanced diet, which consist of dairy, fruit, veggies and some proteins.

You also want to know what is the motive behind it all??? Well I won't lie,I need  to find a suitable partner to get married. I might not find one here in Saudi, but when I do go on my holidays to Turkey,South Africa or other part of the world, I might just get lucky.

Happy Summers! 

Holiday! From Jouf to Demmam

I'm officially on holiday from today! It has been a long and stressful term and any teacher needs a serious break.

However, I am deciding to sweat it out here in Saudi Arabia instead of going anywhere else.

I am tempted to book a flight to Turkey and experience the summer of Istanbul, but at the same time I need to give Saudi a chance. JOUF is not Saudi, and believe me, after spending 6 months here, one would start to believe that Jouf is all there is.

the BIG KABSA DISH in cental Skakah, Jouf

The compound life in Jouf has made life more interesting. Living in a place where there is a sand dune or your right and left can make anyone weep and the mental state can make you call your mom and beg her to fetch you. However,I have grown fond of Jouf. I love the peace and quiet, and the small community feel. 

I live in a small place called Gara and there is a massive Arabic Coffee pot, just as you drive into our compound. There are a few houses surrounding us and the rest is just sand. Most Jouf people tell us "this is not even the real desert"....I beg to differ on that. 

Jouf has taught me a few things. 1 Start shopping, 2 enjoy shopping and 3 shopping is the only thing that you can do.Most of all the teachers at the compound has made it bearable and a "walk in the park". 

If you come to Jouf for the first time, you will probably want to pack your bags and go back to the airport and demand for the first flight out, However, you need to give this province a chance. 

I have recently spoken to my best friend about my love for Jouf, who is from Saudi, and he didn't know Jouf. Before I came here he tried, as in TRIED to get information for me about Jouf. Not even, Saudis come here. So you got to give the teachers a medal for really living here and enjoying the small community.There are some great things to explore. For instance, there is a wonderful olive festival where you can tantalize your taste buds with different olives. Also, you can enjoy the clear air and the moderate summer (as in 45 degrees celcius). You get to go to Shaloop street to get all the bits that you need to start making life in Saudi. There isn't much sightseeing here, only enlarged national items like the BIG KABSA DISH and the BIG COFFEE POT near my house. 

However, as I have enjoyed Jouf, I do need a chance of scenery to revitalize my mind and emotions. I would say it is a "necessity" rather than a "want" to leave Jouf for a week or two. 

That is why I am escaping to Dammam. 

So, I have decided to brave it out in Demmam or Jeddah for my short holiday before summer school starts. I am eager to see  the other side of Saudi Arabia and to learn the Saudi culture. 

I know what you are thinking, "you have been spending 6 months in Saudi and you haven't experienced the Saudi culture" Once again JOUF  is not Saudi. 

I have heard beautiful things about the coast of Saudi, the beaches and the holiday places. I have just booked my flight to Demmam, and I am so curious to discover this place.. who knows...I might just LOVE it. After all, I am a true sucker for the ocean and anywhere where I can sit with a coffee and just watch the waves crashing would bring tears to my eyes.

To be honest I have no idea what to expect of my trip to Dammam. All I know is that a lot of ex pacts are staying there. It is more "open" and there are a lot more things to do. 

I am looking forward to the wonderful places to just sit and sip coffee outside near the beach. I am also looking forward to learn more about Saudi and to get the hang of things. 

After all I am not hoping for a revolutionary holiday. Just a quiet one to keep the sanity alive.

I will sure keep you posted about Dammam and I will swing by Al Khobar to see what is happening over there.

So keep your fingers crossed and I  will splash you with some Arabic coffee and dates.

Peace. 

The Last Goodbye-Dedication to Group 1 and 9

I hate being dramatic about saying goodbye, but today I had too many tears in my eyes. I started teaching at Al Jouf University since last November and I have grown so fond of my students.

I remember the first day that I taught and I was completely besides myself filled with nerves. However,  the girls welcomed me with much love and respect. Soon, my first class, Group 1 was a team. Everything we did was in team effort. Studying together, laughing together and even hating together, we did it as a team. When I had to stay goodbye and swapped groups, I missed my girls.

You see, being a teacher is more than just teaching grammar and the art of English, often teachers have to do the side job of being nurturers and role models for these girls. When I see the girls grow within themselves, finding themselves within their skin, it is an emotional roller coaster. I know each girl that I have taught, even the ones that I taught for a week, I remember their faces and their names.

The second group I took on was in February, and soon I had to learn new faces and new names. They had to learn my face and my name too, often struggling to say "Teacherrrr, Zimkitha" or "Miss Zahra". However, me and group 9 had to get to terms with new things.
The first thing I love about my group 9 is their level of honesty. They were always honest with me and they NEVER  attempted to cheat, EVER...which is beyond amazing. They were not the cleverest of girls, but they always worked hard and were always concerned about their work.
Yes, like any relationship, there were times we hated each other, especially on Wednesdays, because the weekend is around the corner, the weather is too hot and I am trying to get them to work a little harder. There were times we cried in the class and most of all there were the times we laughed and loved each other.
By far, these girls have shaped me into a better teacher, a teacher that looks beyond the classroom.
I have learned from them of how not to take life sooo seriously and to fall in love with the idea of "marriage".
None the less we learned.

Today was the final day for me and my girls. We had a fun day cut out for them, to enjoy the last day with their friends and with us. Soon, the fun day activities kinde faded and we just ended up doing an all time "Saudi style" party, which consists of loud Arabic music and dancing. When I was standing outside my classroom, two of my students came to give me a hug. As I was hugging them, an overwhelming sadness came to me. I realized how much I will wonder about them. Will they go and finish their studies? Will they become the successful young ladies they want? Will they marry and be good mothers? Will they forget or remember English?
My one student asked me" Teacher why cry?" I said to her that "I have seen you grow and it makes me happy, that is why I cry."
I also got to see my first group of girl, Group 1, and gave them as many hugs as I could. Besides they were my firsts, how can one ever forget  ones first class.

So, the chapter is done, and here I am sitting, wondering who will the next new batch of young ladies be? However, I realize that I don't have control over who my girls are going to be next year. However, I do have control of how I can inspire them to be strong young ladies and to know that they can follow their dreams and be whoever they want to be.
So, thank you Group 1 and Group 9 for being amazing girls! I wish you the best of luck.

Your teacher
Zimkitha

One Mic- Compound Skakah Rocking the Suburbs

As Nas says "There's only one mic" and you gotta grab it while you can.
The last Open-Mic event was a mixture of nostalgia and beautiful talent right here in Skakah, Al Jawf, Saudi Arabia.

One of the teachers who performed the most amazing poems said something that stuck to my mind, "it is gatherings like these that often keeps one sane". When he said that, I felt that someone could understand the emotional roller coaster that one can go through if you are in the Middle east...well, in Saudi Arabia.
As much as we are embracing this new culture that we work in and live in, we often feel displaced and trying to find every bit of memory from our previous lives to get a bit of normality in our daily lives in the desert.
The Open Mic nights was a piece of memory from one of the teacher's previous life in USA, and he brought it here in Skakah to share a night of talent and togetherness.
The last open Mic night was my first night of performing for my co-workers and it was bittersweet. The bitterness of it being a little too late for me, and the sweetness of showing the people I work with a bit of me.

I love singing, singing is one of the things that I often keep really private and in my bedroom. However, I come from a deep entertainment world, although it should make me a bit more outspoken and open about my singing, it did the very opposite. I freak out when I perform in front of people, especially people I know. This night was no different. Me and Liz have been practicing "Angel" by Sarah Mclahlan, and it was easy and comfortable. The moment I had to sit in front of all the familiar faces, my stomach was playing roller-coaster and my mind went blank. However, we sang our song, and we sang it well.
In my heart I actually dedicated that song to Liz, because she was the one who approached me about singing together.
Since it was the last open Mic night, it was not only the last open mic night. It was the last open Mic night with some of the teachers that made life really bearable here in the desert. It was really emotional and I felt disappointed that it took me that long to come out of my shell and to share a bit of myself with them.
I decided to sing a song that will always remind me of who I am and where I come from.
Being a traveler, sometimes the only identity one carries is not the passport, but the memories of who are. I carry my name. My name is often the very thing that people notice and ask about it. It is the one thing that I am proud to explain my African heritage.
However, besides my name, I carry my language and thank God, I have not forgotten our language back home. In the memory of my culture and family back in South Africa, I decided to perform the "Click Song",which was originally performed by Mariam Makeba. What I love about that song is that it really gets deep into our language, which is the clicking, something that most people out of Africa won't understand.
I enjoy singing this song, because as a child my father was really fond of teaching us the best part of our language, which is the clicking.
I didn't know how the teachers will react to it, but I didn't really worry about it.
While I was singing it and in my head I remembered my childhood and sitting on the sofa on a Sunday afternoon hearing the radio playing this song.
I was happy to have performed this song and to have shared a bit of myself with these teachers. For the ones that are leaving Skakah, I want to say thank you for your lovely weekends, support and helping to keep us all sane. I wish you happiness and prosperity for the years ahead and may we not forget the great times we had together.